Funny Bathroom Graffiti – Funny Products and other funny stuff » 2010 » January

Ten questions you can ask yourself that will help you answer one of the world’s most important questions:

“Am I a douchebag?”

1. Have you ever in your life used the phrase “I’m going to the gym to wail on my pecks”?

2. Do you randomly sit down in public places and play an acoustic guitar?

3. Are you the guy writing on a Mac laptop in the local Starbucks?
Side Note: If you’ve ever brought a guitar into Starbucks, no need to read on… you are a douchebag, period.

4. Have you watched the My new fucking haircut video on youtube and not laughed, but instead ran out and bought all the makings for Jager-bombs?

5. Do you drive a mustang… but you call it a “‘stang”?

6. Do you refuse to go out without your favorite visor on?
Side Note: if you wear the visor upside down, don‘t bother reading on. Walk away from your computer, find the nearest window and jump out of it.

7. Are you now wearing, or have you ever worn more than one polo shirt at a time?

8. Was one or more of said polo shirts worn with a popped collar… on purpose? (Only French people can pull this off without being considered douchebags)

9. Are you now, or at anytime have you ever been French? (Gotcha, popped collars are never cool, neither is being French).

10. Have you, at anytime during the reading of this list, tried to convince yourself that the author doesn’t know what he’s talking about? (You’re most likely French)

Side note: I don’t know why we insist on tooling on the French. I think maybe it’s revenge for all the times Pepe LePew tried to rape that cat during our saturday morning cartoons.
Pepe Le Pew the Rapist

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Bathroom Graffiti

Nothing says “chaos” like 2 inches worth of permanent marker where 90% of passersby won’t see it. This idiot also wins the award for most unoriginal graffiti word/phrase/tag. I’m not sure I understand the connection between “Kaos” and the dollar sign. Maybe there’s a deeper, political meaning behind this… or maybe this guy is just an unoriginal douche. That being said, bathroom graffiti doesn’t need to be complex. If you can’t think of anything, go with a definite winner like an ex-girlfriend’s first name, phone number, and one or more of her many sexual talents.

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Yeah Bolivia!

Classic Bathroom Graffiti “Edit”

No wait…fuck Bolivia (look closely, you’ll see it)! So there!
Where in the world would one find such polarizing views on Bolivia? Were we in Bolivia, or maybe some neighboring country? Chile? Portugal? I don’t even know where the hell Bolivia is.
The point I am trying to make is that neither do 95% of the people in New Hampshire, which is one of the whitest states ever. The state nickname is actually “The Whiter State.”

PS – The Old Man on the Mountain got what he had coming to him. Plus, he owed me money.

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I’m pretty sure that if you try someone’s nugget plug without asking, you’ll end up in jail.

Funny Products

I have no god damned clue what a nugget plug is, let alone what makes Clarke’s so special.

If anyone has any insight into this, please let us know.

Thanks!

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When searching for some home improvement equipment, I came across this little gem.

Funny Products

Sure, I was hoping to find a cheap rotary hammer, but who can’t use a little extra zazz in the bedroom?

Update:  My wife thought it was great.  God rest her soul. If you want to check one out for yourself go to Harbor Freight.

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Classic Bathroom Graffiti “Edit”

A lot of great things happened in ’98: Google was established, McGwire broke Maris’s home run record, Monica Lewinsky sucked the “1st” penis, and poor Steve here carved his name on a dive bar bathroom wall. Unfortunately for Steve, someone else remembered an additioinal detail about that day. I’m amazed that in 11+ years Steve never decided to come back and defend his bathroom stall honor (which in itself sounds pretty disturbing when taken out of context).

What I don’t understand is why anyone would choose to leave their mark on society in this way.  People must know that this is going to happen.  Maybe Steve was smart and carved the whole thing just to beat someone to the punch.

By the way, faux marble walls is one of the signs that you truly are in a dive bar. A lone, hammered, toothless 50 year old woman hitting on you, and/or taxedermied animals are other tell tale signs.

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